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Burning Man

Sep. 7th, 2012 | 04:13 pm

I miss it so much.

That was the most amazing and life changing week of my life.
I have never been happier. I feel like I was tested emotionally and physically. And I feel so so strong.
I understand why people call it home. I felt more at home there, than I have anywhere in the last few years. 
The people were amazing, community at its finest. I was given gifts, food, kisses, hugs, converstation, advice ect ect from strangers. I spoke with strangers as if they were my life long friends. I cruised around the esplanade at night, feeling like I was literally on another planet. I got caught in a dust storm (white out) and loved every minute of it. So beautiful. I cried when I saw the temple, and cried when I visited it again. I wrote something on the temple, that came to me as I was holding the pen. I felt so inspired, I loved myself and everyone around me. I cannot express with words what burning man is. It's far too beautiful, far too wonderful, far too life changing. The art is incredible. I saw my potential, and the potential of what people can be.
Black rock city will forever be my home. I am hoping that I can find that beauty in this default world. And carry it with me the rest of the year, until it is time to go home again. 
My car is still covered in playa. I don't even want to wash it.

I am going to psychdelic fridays tonight, hopefully that will be a good way to decompress and find more of the beauty that I know to exist. 

I'd also really like to have some fucking amazing sex right about now.

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Leaving for burning man!

Aug. 25th, 2012 | 03:38 pm
mood: bouncy bouncy

My sisters are camped a mile and a half away from me :O 
It isn't actually that bad, but it is hot, and moon terrain, and dry and ahhhh
They could be a lot farther though, so I am glad that I don't have to walk all the way across the playa. I am so excited and nervous. 
I have no idea what to expect. But I have every single thing I could ever want or need in the desert. (or anywhere, really) I decided last minute to take my car, in case I needed some alone time/wanted to leave early (which I doubt, and even if I do, I'm going to push through it) Have an awesome RV to camp in with awesome campmates. I am so nervous. so so nervous. But so jittery and excited!! ahhhhhh!! <3

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More music!

Aug. 19th, 2012 | 08:00 pm

These two songs have been stuck in my head, Ordinary world by Duran Duran:

Came in from a rainy Thursday
On the avenue
Thought I heard you talking softly

I turned on the lights, the TV
And the radio
Still I can't escape the ghost of you

What has happened to it all?
Crazy, some are saying
Where is the life that I recognize?
Gone away

But I won't cry for yesterday
There's an ordinary world
Somehow I have to find
And as I try to make my way
To the ordinary world
I will learn to survive

Passion or coincidence
Once prompted you to say
"Pride will tear us both apart"
Well now pride's gone out the window
Cross the rooftops
Run away
Left me in the vacuum of my heart

Papers in the roadside
Tell of suffering and greed
Here today, forgot tomorrow
Ooh, here besides the news
Of holy war and holy need
Ours is just a little sorrowed talk

Annnd Bitches ain't shit by Dr Dre
Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks
Lick on these nuts and suck the dick
Get the fuck out after you're done
And I hope in my ride to make a quick run...

I once had a bitch named Mandy May
Used to be up in them guts like everyday
The pussy was the bomb, had a nigga on sprung
I was in love like a motherfucker lickin' the pearl tongue
The homies used to tell me that she wasn't no good
But I'm the maniac in black, Mr. Snoop Eastwood
So I figure niggaz wouldn't trip with mine
Guess what? Got gaffled by one time
I'm back to the motherfucking' county jail
6 months on my chest, now it's time to bail
I get released on a hot sunny day
My nigga D.O.C. and my homey Dr Dre
Scooped in a coupe, Snoop we got news
Your girl was trickin' while you was draped in your county blues
I ain't been out a second
And already gotta do some motherfucking chin checking
Move up the block as we groove down the block
See my girl's house, Dre, pass the glock
Kick in the door, I look on the floor
It's my little cousin Daz and he's fuckin' my hoe, yo
(Bitches ain't shit)

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Music <333

Aug. 18th, 2012 | 12:13 am

I don't know how I'm gonna tell you
I can't play with you know more
I don't know how I'm gonna do what mama told me
My friend the boy next door.

I can't believe what people saying
You're gonna let your hair hang down
I'm satisfied to sit here working all day long
You're on the darker side of town.

And when I'm out I see you walking
Why don't your eyes see me
Could it be you've found another game to play
What did mama say to me.

That's The Way
Oh, That's The Way it ought to be
Yeah yeah, mama say
That's The Way it ought to stay.

And yesterday I saw you standing by the river
And weren't those tears that filled your eyes
And all the fish that lay in dirty water dying
Had they got you hypnotized?

Yesterday I saw you kissing tiny flowers
But all that lives is born to die
And so I say to you that nothing really matters
And all you do is stand and cry.

I don't know what to say about it
When all you ears have turned away
But now's the time to look and look again at what you see
Is that the way it ought to stay?

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;(

Jul. 12th, 2011 | 04:48 pm

  I hate being so nauseous that I puke. ;-;

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(no subject)

Jun. 21st, 2011 | 03:12 pm

 woot!
going to Ian's tonight! I love their house.

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I think I'm going to go vegan

Jun. 6th, 2011 | 03:13 pm

 I haven't eaten meat or dairy in a really long time.
I kinda live off of rice cakes and almond butter, or at least, I have been for the last three weeks.
Plus daiya cheese is better than any real cheese, ever. And the thought of eating murder still grosses me out.
Except that I don't eat soy. I'll just have to make everything again.

Here is your Today's Scorpio Horoscope
If you have a long-distance relationship in progress, don't expect to be willing to draw it out much longer. You're after a real, live human companion now -- someone who's actually in the same room.

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uh

May. 25th, 2011 | 04:00 pm

sometimes it's not so nice to talk to someone and know how much they want to plow the fuck out of you.

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I forgot how much I love this song

May. 24th, 2011 | 10:49 am

 


oh and this one!

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Rest in peace

May. 19th, 2011 | 01:58 pm

Our dog tink died today.
My mom rushed into work crying, and told Celine and I that Tink had a seizure and died in her arms.

I don't know what to feel right now, when I was at my parents house, Tink slept with me and let me cry on her, she let me take terrible pictures with her. She always made me feel missed when I moved out. I really do love that little ball of fluff. She was way too young to pass on. 
 
 
</3
 
My heart has not felt so defeated in a while.
I'm gonna  float on.
But all I want is a bear to hug me.
 

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